Irreplaceable
by loren x vy
Summary: C B. Torn between two. Who do you chose? The one that you love, or the one that loves you?
1. Chapter 1

This is my first fanfic. Enjoy.

She sat there starring at her reflection through the mirror. What was wrong? What's happened to her life? She has got everything that she ever wanted and more. What else could a girl ask for? She's got the man she loves, more than enough money to spend and yet, she felt as if something was missing in her life. Happiness.

As she slid her engagement ring off, she heard a knock on the door. It was Chuck.  
"Hey HoneyB, you almost ready?"  
"Yeah, I just have to put on some cover-up"  
"Why would you need cover-up? You're beautiful just the way you are"  
"Thanks, but not everyone has the same opinion as you do."

"Haha, okay. I'll be downstairs waiting. Don't take too long though. Nate and his fiancé are expecting us soon. Oh, and I got the limo you like."

She gave a long sigh after Chuck left the room. What bothered her was the fact that Chuck didn't know what she liked.. He didn't know anything about what she wanted either. He always made decisions up for her. It's been strange between them since they've returned from England. Their relationship was different there. Or maybe it was just something she never thought it was. When he purposed, she felt like they were rushing it. But she didn't have the heart to tell him that she needed some time. That they needed sometime. From the outside looking in, they were the perfect couple. Rich, beautiful, happy and in love. But no one knew what it was like to be her. To be Chuck's fiancé. It wasn't that she didn't love him. She did. It was just that their relationship had seemed surreal to her. That maybe it was all just a lie. She decided to put back on her engagement ring and the fake smile that she's been wearing for the past month.

As she walked through the Archibald's entrance, her eyes caught Nate right away. She remembered the last time seeing him. It had been awhile. Maybe a year and a half? Nate welcomed the both of them with a heart warming hug. His smile was bigger than ever. He hasn't really change much since the last time she saw him. He seemed so happy. "Hey, I want you to meet my fiancé. She said she's been dying to meet you. Hey sweetie, come here."

Behind the tall blonde girl, a beautiful stunning brunette appeared from her back. She was gorgeous. She was not too tall but, not too short. Her hair was curly and long. She had big brown eyes and a mischievous smile. From head to toe, this girl was Upper East Side material. Yet, she somehow looked familiar to her. She could have sworn that she's seen her somewhere before.

"Hi there, I'm Blair Waldorf. Nice to finally meet you."

"Nice to meet you too, I'm Brooke Livingston."

"Lovely name, so how long have you and Chuck known each other?"

"Its been about two years maybe? How about you and Nate?"

"Oh, we've been together since grade school.. Wow, two years? That's quite the accomplishment for Chuck Bass."

Before she could even reply, Brooke felt a gush of wind run right through her. Chuck had tightly grabbed Blair by her sides and push her into him. Blair quickly reacted with an uplifting grin. It wasn't like the same smile that she had just gave Nate or Brook. With this smile, Brooke somehow knew that there were secrets waiting to be unfold behind their casual hug.

"B, how are you? You look amazing as usual."

"Thank you Bass. Pretty good myself, how about you?"

"Hanging in there, trying to get use to the city, weather and people again."

"Are you kidding me? That was one of the last things I'd expected to hear. Especially from you."

"Well, things change."

"Yeah… yeah, they have."

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Flashback

"I'm surprised that you're not mad at me yet."

"If you know I don't like it, then why don't you stop."

"Who are you kidding? It's me, it's who I am."

"Well then, you will change."

"How do you know I'm going to change?"

"Because you don't want me to be unhappy."

Chuck looked at Brooke, then stared at the floor.

"I'm sorry."

"See, I told you that you'd change."

"What?"

"Think about it, have you ever sincerely said sorry to someone in your life before?"

There was a moment of silence.

"That, you're wrong about. I have truly said sorry to one person."

"Oh. And who would this lucky person be?"

"It doesn't matter anymore. They never accepted it anyways."

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I'll try to finish the next chapter soon :)


	2. Chapter 2

When all the guests were seated, Blair told the maids that it was time to serve dinner. While eating, everyone at the table had small side conversations. Everyone's attention was practically on Chuck the whole night. They all seemed so happy that he was finally back, and he seemed even happier. As the night went on, Brooke noticed that she had a lot in common with the future Mrs. Archibald. They both adore The Killers, Audrey Hepburn, vintage headbands, and Chanel handbags. Their personalities and hobbies weren't the only thing that had in common. They also had similar features.

"Two years and you still haven't changed one bit Chuck." - Serena

"Neither have you Van der Woodsen." - Chuck

"Yeah, but a lot of things and places have changed since then." - Serena

"What do you mean?" - Chuck

"Remember the old park by our elementary school?" - Serena

"Yeah, that's where we all met for the first time, right?" - Chuck

"Wow, it's been that long?" - Nate

"Yeah, well it's being torn down." - Serena

"Oh my gosh...I loved that place! That's were I got my first kiss." - Blair

"Me t.." - Chuck

Chuck stopped himself before finishing his sentence.

"Wait, Blair. I thought we had our first kiss in your backyard on Valentine's Day?" - Nate

"Oh yeah, right. It must have slipped my mind." - Blair

Blair politely smiled at Nate and quickly looked down at her plate trying to avoid eye contact with Chuck. However Brooke, who was sitting right across from Blair, knew that what she said was probably not a mistake.

While they all talked about parties, investments and marriage, Brooke realized that she didn't fit into this kind of lifestyle.. at all. As she sat there quietly eating her dinner, Brooke noticed that Blair looked familiar to her earlier was because she had seen her somewhere before. Was it on a magazine? No. Maybe once on the street? No, that wouldn't be possible because she's only returned to New York for a week. Finally! She remembered the glowing smile on the picture that was in their office drawer..

When they returned from England, Chuck told the maids to give Brooke a tour of their penthouse and allow her to do whatever she wished. When Alicia showed her the office, she found many albums of Chuck's childhood. They were all specifically of Chuck being held by a variety of women or him with these three other kids. While looking through the drawers, she also found a shoe box. It startled her at first because why would a random shoe box laying inside his office drawer. She lifted the box and placed it on the table. When she opened the box and there was a scarf inside. Holding the scarf up, she saw a pair of gold ring in the corner of this box. To her surprise, she realized that Chuck had plans for them. This shocked her more than ever. While studying the rings closely, something caught here eyes. Something by the imprint of _C__♥__B. _She screamed and called him right away. Remembering that day, Brooke also noticed that there was something else when she took the box out. A picture laid underneath it.. It was a picture of Chuck and this gorgeous looking girl. They were both standing below a huge oak tree that was outside of Yale University. Chuck had both of his arms around this girl's waist while she was gazing into his eyes. Brooke had asked Chuck about the picture, but he always said that it was just a college fling that he had. All of a sudden, made sense to Brooke. That ring had not been planned for her, but worse of all…hidden from her. As she left the Archibald's mansion that night, Brooke realized that she had found all the missing pieces to her puzzle. And yet, the pieces of her heart was gradually falling apart.


	3. Chapter 3

The chandlers glistened through the corner of her eyes as Chuck guided her across the ballroom. Ahead of her, she could see Blair and Nate dancing and laughing. Even though she hasn't known Blair that long, Brooke always envied her. Blair always seems to have everything under control. She was beautiful, brilliant and talented. Blair was a famous magazine editor as well. But most of all, Blair had something that Brooke never accomplished. To have a man who loves her unconditionally under any circumstances.

"Brooke…Brooke! Are you okay?" –Chuck

"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine. I guess I'm just a little tired, that's all." –Brooke

"Oh, do you want to go home then?" –Chuck

"No, no. I'm fine. I don't want you to miss this party because I know how much you've been looking forward to this." -Brooke

"Tell me if you don't feel good, okay? -Chuck

"Okay." -Brooke

Brooke smiled and laid her head on Chuck's chest. A warm tingly sensation crept up her back. Being held by Chuck made her feel comfortable, calm and safe. It made her feel at home. But what do you do when your home is incredibly close to your heart, yet it seems to be somewhere miles apart.

"And thanks. You know, I love you B." -Chuck

Snapping back to reality, Brooke tilted her head to look at Chuck. She gazed into his eyes searching for an answer. Apparently, it wasn't the one she wanted because she slightly rested her head back on his chest and quietly whispered, "I love you too…" A tear flowed down her cheeks as the kept dancing to the beat of the ballad. Brooke use to love hearing these words, but now they just seem so unfamiliar to her. It was like some foreign language. What was seriously going on? Was she over-reacting again? Or was she just too blind not notice this earlier? Because while telling her he loved her, Chuck's eyes were once more glued on a different girl.

It has been 4 months since these thoughts and questions kept popping in her head. It all started the night where she first met Blair. Brooke kept telling herself that she was imagining things due to all of the stress. But then, all of that went away whenever she remembered the way Chuck always looked at Blair. As she interacted with Nate and Blair more often, these ideas and questions kept haunting her every night. Why did Chuck always call her HoneyB? In fact, she couldn't even remember when he did call her Brooke. Has he ever been in love with Blair? What happened between them? Was she just a…replacement? Did Chuck ever really love her? Does he still want to be with Blair? If he had to choose between Brooke and Blair, who would he pick? Every time she wanted to ask him these endless questions, she was always afraid of the respond.

But tonight was going to be different. Tonight, she would find the courage to finally ask him. She didn't care anymore. Brooke realized that it was better for her to be brave and risk their relationship, then to live through a relationship of misery and lies. It was now or never. Brooke stopped in the middle of the song.

"Chuck, I think we need to talk."

She quickly lifted her silver Chanel dress as she slid through the arch doorway with Chuck following close behind her.


	4. Chapter 4

Brooke stopped mid-way between the marble fountain and the Erikson's mansion. It was a cold crispy night. The wind was giving her goosebumps and the thought of confronting Chuck made her stomach flinch.

"Chuck, I don't even know how to ask you this. Or even if it's the right thing to do. But is there something going on that I should know?"

"What do you mean?"

"Do you still have feelings for her?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Chuck, you know perfectly well what I'm trying to say. You don't have to tell me everything, but please…just don't lie to me."

He stared at the fountain as the water carelessly dripped on the rose petals.

"Do you...love me?"

"This is crazy. You know I do."

"Well then, do you love her more than me?"

"Who?"

"Blair!"

"How did you..."

"That doesn't matter. Just answer my question. Do you still love her?"

Brooke stared at Chuck desperately waiting for an answer. This time, he was looking straight into her eyes. He heavily sighed as the word "yes" slipped out of his mouth. Both of her hands rose to her face as she tried to hide the pain of his answer. She blinked numerously to stop the tears from flowing down her face. But none of this helped. Nothing ever would. It wasn't like this answer just blew out of nowhere. She knew it was coming. She knew that she had to face the truth sooner or later.

"Chuck, I can't… I can't do this anymore."

"No. Yes, you can. I love you just as much as I love Blair. I really do. But everything's changed. She's moved on."

"Yeah, but you haven't! Chuck can you honestly tell me that you don't have any thoughts about still being with her? …Yeah, I thought so. You know, maybe it's just one of those things. You still love her, and only her. Maybe not. Or maybe, she's just irreplaceable."

"B, I need you."

"No. What you need is to find out what you truly want. Chuck, you know I love you. And I always will…

"Then what's the problem here? Blair and I are over. We have been."

"Do you know how much it hurts knowing that the person you love, loves someone else?"

Brooke shook her head and continued.

"But I guess there's a point in life where that doesn't matter anymore. When you love someone, you have to think about them before yourself."

"B, I'm sorry. I really am. I never meant to.."

"I know. It's okay. If we were meant to be, then everything will find its way in the end. But if we weren't, then just know that I wouldn't have done it any other way. You have already done enough for me. You seriously don't owe me anything. You've shown me so much. The time spent with you was one of the best years of my life. But I just know that I have to stop trying, and you know there's no denying. Clearly, we weren't happy together."

"Brooke, I love you. And just so know you, you were never a replacement."

Brooke forced a smile across her face. She bent down to kiss Chuck on the forehead. Then, she whispered into his ear, "Don't worry about me. Just follow your heart." With that, she finally decided to let go of his hand. She stood up confidently and walked down the street. It was her way of proving to him that she was totally fine without him. Which by the way, was totally untrue. Brooke felt relieved and proud of herself. She knew that it was time to stop fooling herself and the world. But this doesn't mean that she didn't love him. She didn't dare to look back because if she did, she knew that the misery would continue. Everything she said back there were lies. All of it. She wasn't okay. She still loved him. Brooke couldn't stand the thought of Chuck with another girl. She didn't want to leave him. Except, she knew she had to. It was time for her to give up. She was too tired and restless. As she walked toward the limo, she smiled to herself. Like her mother always said, "It's not about the clothes you wear or the life you've led; it's the face you show the world." Brooke was falling apart but she didn't dare show it. Brooke took one last look at Chuck as she slid into the limo. Chuck still sat on the edge of the fountain where she last left him. His head was buried in his hands. She could see a figure approaching him. Even though she was trembling, she knew that she did the right thing. It was the best for her, and for Chuck. She was leaving behind a glamorous life that she'd always wanted, an unfinished chapter of her serial fairytale, and the love of her life. Brooke told herself to stop crying just because it ended, and that she should be smiling because it happened. Because like the place in Chuck's heart, none of this was rightfully hers.


End file.
